Tomorrow is the day
So tomorrow I have a doctors appointment at NARA. This will be my first time seeing this doctor. I’m going in to have my copper IUD removed, and talk to him about getting the shot, and about lyme. The previous doctor there wouldn’t even discus lyme disease with me. I’m hoping this time it will be different. At the very least I need to see if he’ll give me something for pain. I want treatment, and help, but I’ll take what I can get at this point. It’s exhausting. I can’t sleep because of the pain, and I can’t function because I get no sleep. I am constantly frustrated and emotional, it only gets worse the more I hurt. It’s like this never ending cycle of pain and exhaustion and frustration. I don’t have good days anymore. I have bad days, and then worse days. My good days are still filled with pain.
I’m terrified of going to the doctor. I am so afraid he’s going to call me crazy, tell me Lyme disease doesn’t exist, or I can’t possibly have it, because it’s so hard to get. I’ve been turned away twice. The closest doctor I know of that specializes in lyme is in Seattle. We don’t have the money to travel there, let alone the money to pay for treatment. At NARA I don’t have to pay, because I’m part Native American. If they won’t help me there, I’m not sure what options I have anymore.
I’ve switched over to all natural toothpaste and hair products. I’m still trying to find a soap, and deodorant I can use. I drink water from water filters and I’m trying to switch over to a raw food diet. Bleh. Wish me luck for tomorrow, and hope/pray/whatever you do that I’ll get the help I need.