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I’m not. I rearranged our room today. Got stuff sorted and organized and I may or may not have taken husbands dresser apart and took it outside. >.> I’m sure he’s going to kill me but oh well. Anyways. I decided to take a bath because my back was spasming and I was cold. I opened the drain for the water to drain. I just sat there staring at my feet after all the water drained out. Then it hit me. I’ve been allowing my illness to basically sacrifice my life. I refuse to do that any more. I’m basically going to live my life like I am dying. If I’m gonna go down it’s gonna be in flames. There’s so much I want to do and be and live. I’m not living a life right now. I’m living around an illness. Ain’t happenin’ no more. Nope. That is all. Yay to bath tub revelations.


Today Kharizma and I were planning on hanging out. You know hanging out that isn’t in a doctors office or chiropractors office or, you know, the ER? Nope. Too effing bad. Last night I managed to fall down threes stairs and hit my head and various other things. I was terrified something could be broke. Mostly because I break things in strange circumstances. . . Rollerskating, getting hit by a suburban, closing my thumb in a sliding glass door. To my surprise and happiness it’s just a badly sprained ankle. I was gifted a pink wheely-walky-thing and it arrived yesterday. Seriously not even a half hour before I fell. I think I would have died today without it. <3 So THANK YOU AWESOME PERSONS WHO GIFTED IT. It’s really awesome. Besides being pink it totally has reflectors that look like car taillights. I must decorate it with bats and crows and put my name on it. It must have been a sight today. Walking, okay hobbling around on a pink walker, with pink hair, and a pink Rx bag and so on.

So the day ended up being get black rock coffee of awesomeness(seriously caramel blondie anything is SO good) > gas > Dr. Bobby’s office for adjustments > drop off pee jug at OHSU > Milwaukie Providence ER. Seriously. We’d planned on NOT doing anything doctory outside of dropping off my pee. However the universe lined up and decided I should practically murder myself last night. It was so stupid too. I haven’t had a whole lot of luck with my depth perception lately. So what I thought was stepping down once was actually three. It was like those movies with slow motion. In my head I was yelling OMGWTHFWHY and then I fell on my left side and gave myself rug burns, bruises and scrapes on my legs. Cause you know falling earlier the same day on the floor in my room too far away to reach my phone so I sat pitifully in the corner yelling for help for you know about an hour wasn’t enough. LET’S REALLY HAVE SOME FUN AND ALMOST BREAK HER NECK! THAT’S SO AWESOME.

So yeah I fell earlier in the day. Couldn’t reach my phone. Couldn’t get up because my legs wouldn’t work. Sat here screaming so much I was going hoarse. Lucking Fumiko cam bouncing down the hallway. I screamed for her and the door flew open and she had this look of beguilement. I told her to go get Nana, which she did, and Steve and his son were in tow. They literally had to lift my fat ass up onto the bed. At least it didn’t break a fan this time. As my health gets worse and worse certain things just don’t seem important anymore. I’m sorry this post is all over the place but I gotta get it all down while I can or I’ll turn around in five minutes and forget what I was doing. No joke. So anyways. They also saved me about a week ago when I fell in my front yard. The neighbors probably thought I was drunk. I SWEAR I HAVEN’T HAD A DRINK IN A LONG TIME. REALLY. But yes, they lifted me up so I could sit in my wheelchair, which reminds me. Hai I’ve been using a wheelchair.

So anyways. Certain things become less important. Like being comfortable in your own skin. No offense to anyone else who is plus sized, but I’m fat. Like, HUGE. I wear a 3x now. I’ve gained about 40 pounds since starting insulin. I hate it. It sucks. But it is what it is. I’ve tried everything over the years and I can never get below 200. Today I had a sort of epiphany while sitting in the ER making stupid jokes about things. And it just hit me. And I cried. Why couldn’t I have done this sooner. I decided I don’t care about how fat I am anymore. I’m not going to think “If I lose fat such and such a thing will be my reward.” But that never happens. I can’t spend the rest of my life not doing what I want just because I’m fat and I don’t feel comfortable in my own skin. So it’s done. I’ve decided I don’t care. And if I don’t care then it doesn’t matter if anyone else cares about my fat. I need to find clothes and things I am happy in. If I ever lose weight then great I can buy new clothes. But if that never happens then oh fucking well. I don’t care if you see my fat rolls. I just. I need to do what I need to do because I wanna be happy in my own skin and I don’t care who doesn’t like me for what I look like. Oh fucking well it’s your problem not mine. I’ll keep to lose weight. But I’m not going to sit here and cry when it doesn’t happen.

So yeah. That happened today. I already started looking up striped tights in my size and black skirts and tshirts. Don’t ask me why. I just want striped tights, long skirts and tshirts. So you know. If you have any places you like to shop for say 3x I would be eternally grateful. So whatever. I’m not putting my cheek piercings or tattoos on hold anymore as a reward for losing weight. I’ll be getting them because I want them and that’s that.

So. It is what it is and I can’t think of anything else now and I’m not really sure where this post was headed.



So BlogHer sent me some Dove conditioner to try out. I was excited to receive it since I’ve been looking for a new conditioner. I received the Nourishing Oil Care conditioner. The bottle says it’s supposed to revive dry hair as well as rough and frizzy hair. Since summer has started I’m sure a lot of you have been swimming in pools, rivers and the ocean. That can lead to some pretty bad hair, especially for color-treated hair and the chemicals used in pools. I know I bleach my hair because I dye it pink. If I’m not careful I get frizzy straw-like hair. That was a huge reason for me cutting my hair. :( I regret cutting it because this conditioner is great for the ends of my hair. It’s a little too much for my roots, but that won’t be a problem after my next bleaching.

Overall this has been a great conditioner for me. It’s thick and creamy, it definitely nourishes my hair and I would recommend it. It has a lovely smell that is subtle and doesn’t mingle with any perfumes. This is also available in daily treatment conditioners and a few more conditioners. If you want more information I would visit I have a couple more things to tell you! Dove is holding a giveaway right now! You’ll find all the details down towards the bottom down there. I would enter because you’ll have a chance to win a $1,000 Spafinder gift certificate! Also please visit the Dove Hair site for a $1.50 coupon for Dove Therapy products. :d

This was a sponsored post but all thoughts are my own. :) It really is a good conditioner.

Enter to win a $1,000 Spafinder gift certificate!



You may receive (2) total entries by selecting from the following entry methods:

a) Follow this link, and provide your email address and your response to the Promotion prompt

b) Tweet (public message) about this promotion; including exactly the following unique term in your tweet message: “#SweepstakesEntry”; and then visit this link to provide your email address and the URL to that Tweet.

c) Blog about this promotion, including a disclosure that you are receiving a sweepstakes entry in exchange for writing the blog post, and then visit this link to provide your email address and the URL to that post.

This giveaway is open to US Residents age 18 or older. Winners will be selected via random draw, and will be notified by e-mail. Winners will have 72 hours to claim the prize, or an alternative winner will be selected.

The Official Rules are available here.

This sweepstakes runs from 9/4/2012 – 9/30/2012

Be sure to visit Dove® to get a coupon for $1.50 off Dove Hair Therapy products.



More indie interviews! Today we have Rebecca from Ella’s Lead.

Luna: How long have you been making collars and other animal things, and what made you start?
Rebecca: We started making dog-related products in 2007. We started out making leashes. We started making these items because, well, basically, I was sick of hardware failure on cheap collars and leashes. Ella was not a dog we could afford to have equipment failures with.

Luna: Do you donate to various animal shelters?
Rebecca: Yes! We have quite a few rescues we donate to that can be found on our “Collars for Causes” page. But, we also donate to the occasional rescue that contacts us about a fundraiser or silent auction. Another reason we started our business was because we could not foster because Ella couldn’t be around other dogs. So, we would donate leashes to local rescues. I kind of see rescues as 50% of the reason we started making our products.

Luna: What is your favorite thing that you make?
Rebecca: Oh, man! I have so many favorites! It’d be easier probably to ask me which I least like to make. HA! One of my favorite designs, though, would have to be “The Goldmund.” OH! And “The Fring”. I also like some of our simpler designs like “The Mann”, “Eunice”, “Lu’s Remedy”, “The Pinkman” and “Goodman”. Oh! And our “Walking the Dead” collar line, which is our Walking Dead-inspired collars. I’m also really into leather leashes. Ben makes all the leashes, but I’m going to learn how to braid them soon, and then those will be added to my list of “favorites”. Nice leather leashes are really underrated.

Luna: How many animals do you own and how did you come by them?
Rebecca: I have 3 dogs, a tortoise, a pet rat, and several geckos. The geckos I got from gecko breeders. I got my tortoise from a breed, my rat from a breeder, and my dogs were all adopted from various Chicagoland rescues.

Luna: What kind of collars and leads and such do you make and do you make collars for other mammals besides dogs?
Rebecca: We make leather collars, leather leashes, and rope leads. We make custom embroidered collars, and we make custom latigo/bridle metal studded collars. And, yes, we collar cats regularly, and we recently made a collar for our first human customer. :)

Luna: Would you rather be a Crow or a Bat?
Rebecca: I want to be a hybrid mixture of the two. Not because it’d be necessary, but because it would awesome!

Luna: Is there anything else you’d like to add?
Rebecca: Thank you for interviewing me! I don’t get this opportunity often, and it is always fun to talk about my passion (dogs, collars, and leashes).

Luna: Are you a butt, Y/N?
Rebecca: No. I am ALLLL hip! :p

You are a sweet, lovable, kind lady. <3 Your collars are gorgeous. I love the one you made for Mochi! Next step is Zero’s. I love how active you are with shelts/safe havens. You are awesome lady. Maggie is the cutest pup ever. Oh man. She melts my heart. I’m happy she got a loving family. :d I also need to get a bracelet for you for my stupid id tag thing. xd Oh and thank you for answering my questions!


Ermahgerd. You’re going to die. Becca from One Hand Washes The Other brought back fragrances from 2010 and 2011, as well as new scents for 2012. Get ready for a giant fragrance list! I love Autumn. It’s my favorite time of the year. The air is cool and crisp with the scent of leaves turning. I can’t wait to make apple cider and go to the pumpkin patch. Pumpkin Eater and Burning Times are two of the several OHWTO scents that make Autumn better for me. BUY THEM. Ahem. The following scents are available in a multitude of ways. There are solid scents for $5.50, oils for $10 and several other things. Some products are only available in certain scents.

Returning from 2010 and 2011 we have the following:
Coven: a deep, spicy blend of jack-o-lanterns, dragon’s blood, patchouli and amber, spiked with citrus and grounded out by a drop of dark and smoky vetivert.

Sugar Skulls: this is a blend inspired by Dia de los Muertos, or, the Day of the Dead, specifically the sweet treats available at this time of year. You’ll smell sweet baked goods, vanilla cookies, anise, and roses- all the scents of a stroll through a Mexican neighborhood at that time of the year.

Pumpkin Eater: No, it’s got nothing to do with that movie from the 60’s… it’s more to do with a story. As long as anyone can remember, the tale’s been told, every Halloween night one can go up to old Peter’s house, past the cemetery and up the hill, through the pumpkin field and the wood just past it, and catch a glimpse of his ghost if you bring him an offering of a pumpkin. Surrounded by pumpkin fragments, they say he can be seen sitting where his body had been found years before, still consuming the flesh of pumpkin after pumpkin, as though he’d never left. This fragrance smells of mangled pumpkin flesh, tilled earth, and a dash of spiced cider, haunted by an apparition of patchouli. This fragrance NEEDS skin to fully blossom into its full potential, please don’t judge this one on cold sniff in the tube/bottle!

Calaveras: Named for the sugar skulls which adorn the Day of the Dead altars, this fragrance is sweet and spicy. Cinnamon, sugar, orange, and sweet breads dressed up with a smattering of dried roses on a sandalwood altar.

Burning Times: “Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live”; motivated by fear, or some would say, by greed, the execution of a witch nearly always included the burning of her body, though the method of dispatch may have varied. Vanilla, Clove, Patchouli, Pink Peppercorn, a hint of Suede, Red Musk, Sandalwood, Cinnamon, Cedarwood, and the smoldering Embers of a thousand years.

Solanum: Infectious! The virus responsible for all instances of zombie outbreaks, solanum has a 100% fatality rate, and yet somehow the undead never seem to stink too terribly. The toxicity level of undead flesh slows down the process of decomposition, killing most bacterium foolish enough to try to decompose a zombie. All studies thus far have shown an absence of bacteria in the flesh of the undead. This has the interesting side effect of giving most zombies little offensive smell other than slight flesh decay, due to the absence of the bacteria responsible for body odor and the traditional smell of rotting flesh. Rotting pumpkin, Apple cores, Raspberry, Almond, Madagascar Vanilla, Cardamom, and a hint of Immortelle because zombies never die.

Mirror Witch: Legend says that in order to summon the spirit of Bloody Mary, also known as The Mirror Witch, you must say her name thirteen times in front of a mirror, in the dark; it is said that on the thirteenth repetition she will appear. Upon appearing, the Mirror Witch may do any number of things to her summoners, depending entirely upon her mood upon being awakened. If she’s not offended you may get away with a scratch, but offend her and the price may very well be your life. Reverent gifts of Pomegranates, Dried Figs, White Sage, Candied Ginger, and a vision of White Musk.

Bobbing for Apples: A game traditionally played at Halloween parties, bobbing for apples involves a water-filled tub and apples floating in it, waiting for you to pick them up with your teeth. Fun!Fresh Apples, Apple Skin, Bonfire Smoke, Hay Bales, and Tonka Beans.

Green Lady: Poor Elizabeth; after her husband Benjamin didn’t return from a trip to town when expected, Elisabeth went out into a terrible storm to find him, and then tragically drowned in a nearby swamp during the search. Some people have questioned the story and wonder if Benjamin may have murdered her and covered up his heinous deed with the drowning alibi. Regardless of exactly what caused her demise, she has been roaming the damned earth for centuries. Appearing to startled visitors as a green mist, which becomes the clearly defined shape of a woman in a green dress, she then gives an otherworldly smile before disappearing just as quickly. Green Bartlett Pears, a basket of Figs, and an apparition of spectral Musk.

Children Shouldn’t Play With Dead Things: A creepy multimedia fragrance experience, see this video ; sweet baby sweet baby sweet baby. Acorns, Oak, Vanilla, Apples, Roasted Spiced Pumpkin, a bit of Musk and a mound of freshly-dug Dirt. Sort of disturbing!

Final Girl: The Final Girl is a horror/slasher film character type which specifically refers to the last female alive to confront the killer; the sole survivor who lives to tell the story. A crushed corsage of Magnolias and Carnations, the Musky Cologne of a Maniac, a whiff of Oil from a freshly-sharpened Chainsaw blade, and the paralyzing scent of Fear.

And, new for 2012, these fantastic fragrance offerings:

Jack. In Black.: Charred, sooty, dirty pumpkin flesh, Arabian musk, Pomegranate, Tea, and a handful of penny candy snatched from an unsuspecting trick-or-treater’s pillowcase.

Seance: Nutty bold-roast coffee, heavy oak furniture, carved sandalwood totems, dried herbs, neroli, vanilla’d figs, and a wreath of clary sage to ward off bad spirits.

Dullahan: A tribute to the original headless horseman! An abundance of harvest spices, black leather, black tea, clary sage, buttery caramel, and civet.

Ravensblood: The last blackberries of the year, dark musk, licorice spiked with clove, guiacwood, labdanum, sandalwood, patchouli, and a bright twist of lemon.

Equinox: A veritable cornucopia of harvest time goodness! Fresh apple butter, spiced breads and iced pastries, just-pressed cider warmed with ginger and mulling spice, roasted figs, berries, pomegranates, bonfire smoke, amber, and patchouli.

County Fair: Ripe peaches, Macintosh apples, pumpkin pie, mandarins, black currants, raw honey, plums, Bartlett pears, just-baled hay, orange blossom, and white amber.

Pumpkin Bread Pudding: After blending this I decided it needed to be food, so I googled it to see if had already been done, and sure enough: voila! I haven’t tried this recipe myself yet, but I plan to soon, with minor alterations. This scent is, mmmmm- please do not consume it. Follow the recipe I linked instead if you feel the urge to eat your wrists. Bruleed pumpkin puree, buttermilk, cream, bourbon, bread, vanilla, honey, & pumpkin spice. Actual Madagascar vanilla beans are infused in this one, so you may find a speck or two in the finished product- and many more in the perfume oil, but that’s done intentionally, for aging purposes.

Gracie: Little Gracie Watson. Dead at 6 of pneumonia, her ghost is said to still haunt her childhood home, the Pulaski House, in downtown Savannah, GA. Gracie’s parents had a life-sized sculpture of her made, and you can visit her in Bonaventre Cemetery if you’re so inclined. Be sure to bring flowers- Gracie loves flowers. Roast chestnuts, pumpkin, brown sugar, amber, tobacco leaf, vetiver, cassia, and lavender.

Dudleyville: Located in Dark Entry Forest in Cornwall & Cornwall Bridge, CT, Dudleyville (also referred to as Dudleytown) has been called the most haunted place on Earth. I don’t have the room here to go into the entire story, but it’s a fascinating one involving curses, death, insanity, vortexes, demons… and more. This website’s got a pretty good rundown of the backstory and what to expect should you venture out that way (my advice- don’t do it): Dried leaves, wood smoke, patchouli, fennel, dirt, palo santo, petitgrain, spectral musk, amyris, catnip, ginger, and cardamom.

Headshop Halloween: It’s the scent of your favorite local headshop at Halloween time! Nag Champa incense, pumpkin, vanilla, frankincense tears, & sandalwood.

Sticky Fingers: A light, white scent comprised entirely of foody notes. Keep away from children and pets and anyone who doesn’t know better than to eat perfume. No, really. Creamy white chocolate, gooey marshmallow, a plump dollop of cream cheese frosting, tonka bean absolute, and warmed coconut milk.

Harvest Moon: A circle of dandelions in the grass, spiced blackberries, tart lychee, red tea, sandalwood, and hints of floral amber.

Down a Dark Path: It’s where many a good scary story starts. Fresh figs, Dried Leaves, Carnations, Oakmoss, Amber, Sage, Black Pepper, Pumpkin, Vanilla, Pomegranate, Beeswax, Rhubarb, Lavender, and the scent of an unidentifiable animal stalking you in the shadows between the trees.


Eeee. All the Hallow’s Eve collections are popping up! Evonne of Darling Clandestine has put together four beautiful perfumes for her Halloween Collection. You can purchase all four scents for $44, or you may purchase them individually for $13. These come in special 2 dram dropper bottles. They’re adorable.

All at once, the electric panic that lights up your inadequacies like constellations. Kill it.
Startling, misty, herbal, with notes including avocado and ozone and clary sage.

One Draconian day, the fissures into which your voluptuous youth dissolves. Welcome it.
Unsettling, ethereal, with notes including ozone and blueberry and trampled leaves, soaked in black rum.

Rich as cello, the furious moments you wasted, never recognizing the fire at your command. Taste them.
Deep and decadent, with rich fruitful notes including clove and nutmeg and sandalwood and ripe red apple.

At each silence, the ache of the blade that released your indecorous wrath. Twist it.
Fierce and passionate, with bright bursts of pomegranate, tempered with aged wood and haunted by marigolds.


Woot! Distorria from Detrivore Cosmetics put up her Halloween Collection! You can purchase the entire collection for $27 or you can buy them as singles for $5 each. :)

What you get:
Samhain: a black satin with gold shimmer
Toxicity: A dark brown satin with blue and red shimmer
Crocodilia: a dark satin teal with heavy shimmer
Cavern: a matte pink
Acid Test: an off gold satin
Filth: A satin taupe with a heavy purple shimmer
Absent: a reddish orange satin with gold shimmer
Cadaverine: a light reddish beige matte. Part of the Graveyard Collection.
Memento Mori: a dark plum matte. Part of the Graveyard Collection.


Ermahgerd. Life is kicking my butt right now. Was in and out of emergency what seemed like every other day this past week. MUCH FUN! Things are going back to not so crappy, well crappy. But Autumn is in the air. Or at least the wind was singing of it. COME BACK COOL BREEZES. Sascha met his teacher this evening. She’s rather nice, I think he’ll like her a lot. He also saw his classroom and got to see where he’s going to be sitting. :d He officially starts school on Monday. Woot!

I am turning into a mostly vegetar/Imighteatsushionceinawhileian. Trying to switch over to a gluten/corn/dairy free lifestyle. The corn is going to be the hardest part. d= It just doesn’t agree with me at all anymore. I’ve been nomming on Pacific Food’s Pablano Corn Chowder of awesome sauce. It’s my favorite non-homemade soup. Evar. I can’t deal with trying to substitute meat, so I’m just going to focus on new recipes that don’t need meat substitutes. I’ve decided to mostly focus on Indian and Thai recipes. I grew up on Indian food and loved it. It’s super easy to find meatless recipes. I love Pad Thai and Tom Yum soup. They can easily be made meat-free, and between rice noodles/rice/shirataki noodles I should be good. So I guess that’s it. Instead of going into a very lengthy recount of last week, I shall leave you with pictures of Biggest Catzilla cat and littlest cat. Hopefully I shall be returning to my regularly tuned posts of swatches and my face painted on.



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